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What does "baby whispering" mean and how does it apply to toddlers? |
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Baby whispering is about tuning into your infant by observing, listening, and understanding what's happening from his or her perspective. Even though toddlers are beginning to acquire language and express themselves better than newborns do, the same principles apply. No matter what their age, children thrive when they are listened to, understood and treated with respect.
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In Secrets of the Baby Whisperer for Toddlers you urge parents to accept the toddler they love. What do you mean by that? |
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I meet parents every day who don't grasp who their children are. These moms and dads don't seem to appreciate what they see or what they know, deep down inside, about their own children. They may have the sweetest, most docile child whom other parents would love to have, and they wonder, "Shouldn't he get more involved with other kids?" Or their child might be on the floor, screaming because they wouldn't let her have another cookie, and they're saying, "I don't understand--she's never done this before." Sure. Instead of accepting their child's nature, such parents are in denial. They make excuses for their children or constantly question their nature. In doing so they're inadvertently saying to their toddler, "I don't like who you are--and I'm going to change that." Of course, parents don't mean to negate their children, but in effect, that's what happens. They either see a difficult child through rose-tinted glasses or fail to see what a wonderful child they have. If you don't accept your child's idiosyncrasies you miss the beauty of those unique traits.
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"H.E.L.P." is one of the acronyms you use in this book as a teaching aid. What does it stand for? |
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H.E.L.P. stands for Hold back, Encourage exploration (without hovering), Limit, and Praise. These are the essence of good parenting. By holding yourself back you're gathering information. You watch, listen, and absorb the total picture to determine what your child is all about--so that you can anticipate his needs and understand how he responds to the world. By encouraging exploration, you are showing your child that you believe in his ability to experience what life has to offer and that you want him to experiment with the world around him. By limiting you are asserting your role as the grown-up, keeping your child within safe boundaries, helping him to make appropriate choices, and restraining him from situations that are physically or emotionally harmful. And by praising, you are reinforcing learning, growth, and behaviors that will serve your toddler in the future. /font>
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What is "The Rule of One/Two/Three?" |
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It's a disciplinary tool parents can use in just about any situation, whether it's hitting you or hitting another child, bedtime reluctance or waking in the night, mealtime misbehavior or meltdowns in public, refusal to take a bath or reluctance to get out of the tub. Let's say your toddler hits another child--little Johnny--in playgroup. The first time it happens, look your child square in the eye and say, "No, you may not hit Johnny." The second time it happens, remove your child from the room. In doing so you're sending a message that says, "I'll watch you, I'll guide you, I'll correct you, I'll intervene." If it happens a third time--then it's time to take your child home. When you use the rule of one/two/three you help your child recognize that his behavior has consequences.
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